Carrie stared at her left hand. The brand-new, three-carat diamond resting on her fourth finger twinkled its brilliance and clarity at her, reminding her of her engagement, now three days old. Grey sat on the window seat in front of a bird feeder and pulled her onto his lap.
There’s food in the feeder. Are there still birds this far north in November? Haven’t they all migrated by now?
Neither one spoke but Grey slipped his arm around her waist, steadying her and she rested her head against his shoulder.
“Come on,” he said, easing her off his lap, taking her hand and leading her to the back door.
They pulled on down parkas and gloves, Carrie tucked her shoulder-length streaked blonde hair under a knitted hat. The early risers trudged out into the cold where their shoes crunched on the thin layer of frozen snow. Their breath hung suspended in the frigid air. Grey took her hand again and she followed him down a well-worn path to the lake. The bright sunshine bouncing off the frozen water peeked through gaps in the trees, blinding her temporarily. She could see the thick ice on the lake and a smile came to her lips.
“Let’s go,” she said, pulling on Grey’s hand to increase their speed and moving out onto the frozen surface.
A sudden sharp tug on her hand pulled her back with a jerk.
“No!” Grey hollered at her, folding his arms around her so she couldn’t move.
Carrie looked up at him and raised her eyebrows. “Grey? What the…”
“Don’t go there.” He tightened his grip, his mouth set in a grim line.
“But it’s frozen solid. And it’s so much fun to walk on a frozen lake.”
“It isn’t frozen solid.”
“It is. Look,” she said, squirming to get away but unable to shake off his firm grip.
“No, no, no Carrie.” His eyes shone as he held her still, and she watched him blink back tears.
“What?”
“The ice, it’s wrong. It looks frozen but it isn’t. When I was eight, my best friend, Tom, dared me to go out on the ice. I refused and tried to keep him from going but he wouldn’t listen. He fell through and died before I could get help.”
Carrie hugged him, her cheek on his chest. She moved back a step and looked into his eyes, catching a glimpse of the frightened little boy he was on that horrible day. What a terrifying experience! Her heart melted.
“I’m so sorry. I won’t go there. I promise.”
He leaned his head on hers and closed his eyes. “I couldn’t stand to lose you, too. I love you so much,” he whispered.
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7 comments:
gotta be careful of that ice. If I wasn't chilled already, your snippet finished the job.
You built the tension so well and also touched my heart with Grey's sad memory. I like this couple just from this snippet!
Jennifer said what I was going to say. I feel his pain.
I had the same reaction as Jennifer and Sherry -- good tension and sympathy for Grey. I hope these two end up HEA.
I can certainly understand his fear. What a traumatic experience for Gray. I hope they can work through this--sounds like it could be an issue. Great sample!
Love how you brought the tension slowly into the scene. Chilling.
Very well written Jean! Now I know why I am a writer. I may be nuts, but I'm happy lol
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